POSSIBLE BEGINNINGS TO THE MARCH OF EVENTS WHICH ENDED WITH THE ENTRYWAY OF MY FORMER BUILDING BEING BEFOULED (if they were fancifully chronicled):

1) As she stepped onto the veranda a warm wind whipped across the street picking up the faint scent of shabu shabu…

2) Vance Diddlehopper had always thought of himself as somewhat of a beau brummel…

3) At first blush, the idea of reconstituting someone’s colon with fiberglass seemed the stuff of science fiction…

4) “Why no, I never have rolled my own sausage,” replied Anderson…

5) Shwartzberg had known nights like these before--high dew point, low barometric pressure, hanging cloud formations--and they'd always spelled trouble of a strange sort...

6) Bhuela Jenks stopped as she noticed herself mouthing the lines she'd rehearsed and then decided to say it one last time: "You're out of the gastrointerology game for good Dr. Splotznik,"...